I am looking for some help. I think my X is going to take me back to court for more $. I dont make anymore than when we were married, but she seems to think i got a bonus after the divorce, even though i support my kids and other stuff for them. She still only blames me for the divorce, and not her mad spending and non working, help. the insanity has to stop, doesnt it? Thanks

Hi There,

Whether gay or straight, this is an issue for anyone divorced and paying child support. I may be of no financial help, but I empathize. Fortunately, my ex and I worked together for the most part.

It seems to me...that some old fashioned, being reasonable needs to take place. If you have proof you have made no more income and she takes you to court and loses, doesn't she foot her attourney's bill...Is it worth it ?

If she is unable to be reasonable....you may be stuck hiring an attourney.

Good Luck... I hope some of the other guys have some suggestions.

You could ask her to go to mediation. These services often offer an earnings-based fee structure that is almost invariably less than a solicitor's fees (and sometimes free).

Mediation is usually must less acrimonious a procedure than fighting it out in court. If you can both approach it as a subject that needs a consensus, with mediation there is most often no feeling of having "lost" and it avoids losing face if one doesn't get it all their own way. And, ultimately, the children will feel the difference between a consensus and a judgement.

Here's hoping you can get it sorted out satisfactorily.

James