I barely do. Back then... oh, about 24 years ago for me, 9th grade was the top of Junior High. That was back before we had middle schools around here. Now ninth is officially the start of high school. No more of this Junior and Senior High stuff. As a matter of fact, the high school that I attended no longer exists, but has been combined with two other local rivals to become one big new place.

While it's just a touch sad to see the old building go to pot (although it seems there was a lot of pot back then that I missed out on), my nostalgic feelings this week are not about my by-gone high school days. Nah, I hated high school. The good memories I have are more like treasured moments with comrades in prison camp. The experience itself was not beautiful, but there was beauty in those of us who helped each other survive that hell.

No, my deep sigh today is in thinking that the baby I held in my arms 15 years ago, who stopped crying the moment he heard my voice beside him, whose solid weight I can still feel in my arms, has gone off this past Monday to his first day of high school. I only hope that for him it is a better experience, and perhaps it is. This year he set aside soccer for football, deciding that he has more of a linebacker body (where did THOSE genes come from). And I feel today the way I felt this summer when I dropped him off at football camp, watching my boy walk across that feild with those calves that could kill. It's amazing to watch my child grow up, but I cannot help but feel a sweet melancholy about the tiny tot he once was.

I'm very proud of my son, of all three of them. So Josiah is off to high school. Jonathan is "bored" already with year two of middle school, and Micah, well Micah says it was just another day like last year. He seems to be taking on that easy-going attitude that his big brothers have always had. Perhaps I've done alright at teaching the priorities in life, and hopefully that will make their days ahead a little less traumatic for them. I know, I know... they will face their own dramas and traumas. I am simply grateful for my peripheral role in helping along the natural process for these three amazing young men.

And in less than two weeks, Josiah and I will round out our year of vacations with a trip to Northern Ireland. It will be memorable beyond my imaginings, I am sure. Ninth grade? No, I don't think anything important really happened that year. No real milestones for me. I am glad that his year will be one with some great Kodak moments for Jo. Moments that won't be so easliy forgotten as my last days in Junior High.

Oh, yeah, I remember ninth grade... my family had just moved to Maryland from New Mexico and being the shy guy I am, I was terrified to start school. Brand new in a new school with the whole high school thing to deal with as well... The one amusing thing about it was that my older brother, who is about the same height and almost as blond as me, and I were assumed to be twins... lol... That didn't last long... The one memory I have that sticks with me to this day is meeting a girl named Michelle and for absolutely know reason we started dancing together almost immediately... We were very good friends for years but I've lost track of her since... it's a shame.

Being the gay, tall, skinny, geeky guy who had no sports ability at all, I always befriended the social outsiders as well... and we were a happy band of pranksters... though I distinctly remember being threatened by several older guys because I was friends with one guy's girlfriend... and I remember the taunts for being gay. LOL, once a real homophobic screamed "Fag" at me in the hall... I was a junior at that point and had had my fill... I calmly turned and looked at him and said, "There's only one way you could know that for sure." LOL... I wonder if he's come out in the meantime... I figure that much anger HAD to be hiding something!!! I also remember a big, black basketball player who, for some reason, took me under his wing... I always appreciated his simple presence if someone was giving me a hard time... he never threatened anyone, just provided me back up... And, as he was super cool and was admired, I had very few problems...

Oh, my brother, these days that mark the passages are so wondrous, yet also so hard... Heck, when Jess went to her first day of kindergarten I was unsure of what her response would be. LOL... her response was, "Bye Daddy," and she was out of the car and gone.... she's always been a very social creature.... I, of course, cried and clung to my mother... go figger...

LOL... I can't wait til you become a blubbering idiot at Jo's graduation... as I did at Jesse's... hang on to every moment... they go so damn fast....

I remember the orientation at the high school for the incoming freshman... so overcrowded... so big... how would my bug manage? Somehow, we had managed to have Jess in private school from kindgertan to 8th grade... how could I just leave her to a huge public school? But, just like with kindergarten, I drove her up on the first day and she was out of the car like a rocket. Hee hee... I've never quite figured out how a rather shy and timid dad ended up with such a gregarious daughter... Of course, the same thing happened when she started college... she just dove in headfirst and had tons of friends within days. I'm glad that she never had to deal with high school like I did... walking into the halls with fear because I dared to be open about being gay. Of course, that was 1972-1976... and Jess's high school career was nearly three decades later... and I'm so happy that schools are so focused on inclusion and acceptance now... at least they are here in VERY republican Frederick, Maryland...

To this day, I miss her... I miss being a part of her daily life... I do a kid's show and interact with these kids and my heart aches cuz I think... I want another one!!!

There is no greater achievement than to raise a child who is a good person... and I know everyone on this site is striving to do so... And our children are the proof that we can live open and honest lives and raise damn good kids at the same time...

I feel your.... pain? angst? pride? yearning? nostalgia? As, I imagine, many others here do as well....

Love you bro... and all the best, as always, to our amazing Dads....

Smokey

I would like to forget gr 9-12. Hopefully it will be better for my kid.

With a dad like you, Wiz, I am sure Cody will do well.

Smokey, thank you. You brightened my day!